February 2021 Monthly Review

(note — this is just a messy list for my own accountability. if you are curious about any of it and want to talk more feel free to reach out to me at nichole.lynn.bennett <at> gmail.com)

highlights from the past month

• finished the results and almost all of the literature review section of the race evasive racism in science communication fellowships paper
• survived a hell week of Texas winter storms without power and Marc getting really ill with vertigo
• first draft of positionality statement
• wrote my first peer review! (for Public Understanding of Science)
• wrote my portion of the talk for the Alan Alda Kavli Center talk
• started recruitment and did first interview for STEM graduate students science communication and belonging study
• played Brindlewood Bay rpg with friends
• auditions for a virtual improv show (first time auditioning in a LONG time)
• TA-ing dramaturgy class for Singapore improv theater with Lindsey
• presented share-a-source to Theater Research Methods class
• attended Undoing White Supremacy meeting in Feb
• led discussion for Equity in STEM Education class
• did my taxes

gratitude journal

• questioning my stories and reserving judgements
• letting go
• routines that involve stopping work at regular times
• dancing on zoom with my full heart and awkwardness
• letting go of expectations
• signed up for an audition for the first time in a long time
• being present

morning pages

• the strangeness of time’s passing
• working to see people with complexity instead of judging
• managing expectations
• balancing work, grief, living trauma
• focusing on rest and restoration, not working until I’m burnt out
• doing something creative every day
• resisting the urgent things and reactivity and doing the important things
• making meaning through teaching, reminding myself I love theater
• planting seeds, watching things grow
• buying nice things (like fancy tea) as a treat to myself
• learning to make foods I love (marzipan, pan de queijo, tortillas, pad thai)
• wishing I could travel
• frustration that we have been quarantined for a year while others pretend we aren’t in pandemic
• socializing a grumpy hedgehog
• lots of good deep work (writing!) happening
• abundance
• Marc’s ex-wife won’t have conversations about consent and safety during a pandemic with us and it’s deeply upsetting and frustrating to not to get to see Pai
• slowing down is good
• resisting the urge to “get ahead” and instead just be where I am
• movement and dance, somatic trauma healing
• embodied emotion versus performative emotion in activism
• heal yourself to heal others
• not feeling great about my body but trying to love the me that is struggling to love my body
• wishing people wouldn’t give unsolicited advice
• helping take care of Marc during vertigo
• community care and friends showing up for us
• processing trauma and taking it easy
• missing performing
• roller skating badly
• listening to music
• playing piano
• drawing comics
• science communication as healing
• boundaries — just because I feel guilty doesn’t mean I did something wrong

media consumed in the last month

tv shows

• WandaVision
• Hilda
• Adventure Time
• Schitt’s Creek

books

• A Field Guide to Getting Lost
• The Little Book of Fika
• Sheets
• Sula
• How to Be Successful Without Hurting Men’s Feelings
• 52 Ways to Stay Well in a Ph.D.
• My Grandmother’s Hands
• An Unkindness of Ghosts
• Qualitative Research: Analyzing Life
• Queers Read This
• How We Get Free
• Forever War
• Forever Peace
• Forever Free
• The Art of Thinking Clearly
• Why Trust Science?

music

• Clap Your Hands Say Yeah
• The Younger Lovers
• Aye Nako
• Downtown Boys
• Fea
• MEN
• Big Joanie
• God Is My Co-Pilot

board games/rpgs

• Masks
• Brindlewood Bay

video games

• Rimworld
• A Short Hike

podcasts

• Citations Needed
• Audio QT
• Good Ancestor Podcast
• You Are Wrong About

MOOCS

• ART of the MOOC: Activism and Social Movements
• Introduction to Performance Studies